Pianodao’s weekly series of reflective blog posts
Written by ANDREW EALES
My recent article The Pianist’s Humiliation offered the following advice, courtesy of my wife (an advanced practitioner in child and adolescent mental health, with more than 30 years clinical experience.):
“Never FORCE students to play in public, take exams, sing, or expect them to learn music which is beyond their present level. Reject any coercion. NO always means NO, and we should all be attentive and unquestioningly respectful to our students’ wishes.”
As teachers we might find this advice surprising, even unsettling. Many of us do our level best to encourage students to perform. But there is a thin line between encouragement and coercion, and it pains me that on occasion I have misjudged this with students.
There are many reasons why some players don’t want to perform, not least of which is the fact that some people simply have shy personalities.
It is okay to be shy
A YouGov personality survey conducted in 2019 found that 57% identify as being shy. And yet the notion of being “painfully shy” is steeped in negative connotations: associated with a lack of confidence, an awkwardness in company, even experienced by some as a disability.
Thalia Eley (who is professor of developmental behavioural genetics at Kings College, London) attributes 30% of shyness to genetics.
And as Nadia Finer, author of Shy and Mighty: Your Shyness is a Superpower, insists,
”You can’t change your personality and nor should you have to. If over half the population in the UK are shy, then surely it’s okay that we don’t all have to be loud. The louder people seem to think the quieter people are broken and need to become louder, But why is that? The interesting thing is, you can’t really think clearly when you are talking all the time.”
Shyness can also be highly contextual. A person who appears shy in one setting might be confident and outgoing in another. This is important to note, because a person who seems assured and at ease in conversation or a social environment might not be so when asked to play the piano in front of others.
The Shy Pianist
A feature of A Common Approach that slightly perplexes me is its insistence that performing is a curriculum requirement. Similarly, I have noted some teachers commenting online that taking part in their studio recitals is obligatory, or even a condition for continuing lessons.
And yet many (young and adult) tell me that they don’t want to perform. Does this mean that they have failed as students, or for that matter, that I have as their teacher? In both cases, I think not.
It is wonderful to share music with others, and I believe all players should be given non-competitive, joyful opportunities to perform (however dwindling such opportunities currently seem to be). But not all will want to take part, and we have to accept without argument that that’s okay.
Encouraging Strategies
Sometimes students want to perform, but their shyness gets in the way. Here are some strategies for helping them:
- Discuss their shyness openly. Consider the barriers that prevent the player performing to others, and how they might be overcome.
- Be kind and understanding, ensuring the player understands you value them just as much as those who happily perform.
- Suggest positive alternatives, such as a private performance for a close friend or supportive family member.
- Encourage non-performing learners to still come to studio recitals and other live music events, so that they can enjoy the atmosphere, performances, and chat with others.
- Allow all performers to do so on their own terms. Would they prefer to play first, or later in the programme?
- When players first perform, make provision in case they want to change their mind at the last moment.
- Avoid entering students for competitive events where some, but not all, are rewarded with special commendation or certificates.
Always remember:
Playing the piano is an amazing journey that can bring immense personal satisfaction, cultural enrichment, and genuine enjoyment to our lives…
…whether we choose to perform or not.
